Relax… there is no rush

The importance that we give to time in Latin America is definitely not the same as they do in USA, Canada or Europe. This is linked to why Latinos tend to be late and why things run a little smoother in warm countries generally speaking.

People have different perspectives of time depending on their cultural background, and the importance they give to it could vary enormously. I think everybody knows the Mexican reputation for being late. Well it’s not just a rumor. Really, it’s amazing! Now I get to notice it from an outside perspective. Before, I just thought it was completely normal to be late and I didn’t even notice it. Here are some classic examples in Spanish with it respective translation about the different perspectives on time between Latinos and the rest of the world:

1) Dame 2 segunditos – Give me 5 minutes
2) Dame 1 minuto – Give me 15 minutes.
3) Nomas me voy a tardar 15 minutitos – It only will take me about an hour.
4) Nos vemos en la entrada del restaurant a las 2:00 en punto. – Let’s meet in inside the restaurant at about 2:40
5) La fiesta empieza a las 8:00pm – The party starts at 11:30.
6) Te llamo mas tarde – I’ll call you in a few days.
7) Vamos mañana – We’ll never go.

Seems funny, but it’s true! When I used to make appointments with my friends back in Quebec they would always ask me: “Mexican time or Quebec time? Just to be sure…”. They never ever got to trust me completely with time measures, even when I did my best to be on time, maybe by the end, after 5 years, I got to learn to be in time. Now when I go back to Mexico I get so frustrated. Now I really think it’s important to be in time, it shows respect for the other person’s time. In the other hand, the way it works in Mexico is that when you have an appointment you know in advance that the other person is going to be late, so just need to be late too and you both will be alright. It depends on the formality of the appointment though. This is something you get to master in a lifetime.

So be patient with Latinos… it’s not our fault!

Hitting On Girls

(Versión en español)
El saber como ligarte a una chica, es algo muy importante que todos los hombres deben de saber para tener una noche de antro (antro: bar de noche a donde se sale a bailar) exitosa. No se que tan verdad sea eso que dicen las chicas cuando mencionan que ellas salen a los antros solo para divertirse y bailar entre ellas, porque como hombre, uno no sale nomas a bailar se los aseguro. Los hombres salimos a los antros con la esperanza de terminar en la cama acompañado y la calidad de la noche depende mucho de éste importante factor.

La acción de ligar (ligar: acción que te permite de terminar acoplando con una femenina o con un masculino, dependiendo del caso), puede variar mucho dependiendo de donde estés. En algunos lugares tienes que ser agresivo y en otros solo tienes que ser paciente y esperar a que todo fluya por si solo.

Nunca he ido a Argentina o Italia, pero he conocido gente que venían de ahí y a otros que han visitado alguno de estos paises. Parece ser, que si quieres tener alguna oportunidad de ligarte a una argentina o a una italiana, tienes que tener muy buen verbo (buen verbo = buena hablada) y muchas pelotas. Los chicos argentinos e italianos, son muy agresivos en cuanto al ligue, ellos intentan con cuantas chicas sea necesario antes de obtener cualquier tipo de aceptacion de la parte femenina. Habrá noches enteras en las que se la pasen intentando por aqui y por allá sin tener suerte, pero pues asi se acostumbra. En cambio, en norteamérica y sobre todo en Canadá, los chicos no tienen intentar obligatoriamente ligar a una chica si quieren terminar bien la noche, si no que las chicas son las que se encargan del ligue la mayoria del tiempo. Si eres hombre y estas leyendo esto, debes de estar pensando, "eso debe de ser genial!" Pues dejenme afirmarles que es de poca madre! (poca madre: expresion mexicana utlizada para expresar algo muy bueno). Dejenme explicarles el porqué de esto; en Canada el feminismo esta presente por doquier: las mujeres son independientes, toman decisiones, en fin, las mujeres hacen lo que se les da la gana. Entonces, si un hombre se le acerca a una mujer a tratar de ligar utlizando sus mejores frases de Romeo y Don Juan, las probabilidades de que ligue, son realmente minimas. Al mismo tiempo, si a una mujer le gusta un chico, no tiene porque sentirse apenada de ir y ligarselo con el mismo derecho que un hombre puede ligarse a una mujer. Esta es la manera feminista de ver las cosas, por lo tanto como hombre, lo mejor que puedes hacer es relajarte y esperar si no quieres que te vean como un desesperado y urgido por tener a alguien en tu cama. Por otro lado, las chicas ahora estan poco acostumbradas a que se las liguen por lo de la feminista situación. Pero dejen les cuento mi historia; cuando recién llegué a Canadá, yo solia ligar al estilo latino, lo cual es bastante proactivo, pero no tan agresivo como los italianos o argentinos. Anyways, yo me aventaba e intentaba por aqui y por alla, aunque me batearan (batear: dicese de la accion de no responder a los intentos de una persona al tratar de ligar) algunas veces. El punto es, que algunas canadienses se sienten muy alagadas cuando tratas de ligartelas de buen modo, porque simplemente, ya no estan acostumbradas a que haya hombres que se les acerquen. Con el tiempo, me empece a adaptar a la cultura canadiense y por lo tanto cada vez me hice más pasivo en esto del ligue. Ahora, cuando regreso a México, me es casi imposible el acercarme a una chica y tratar de bajarle la luna y las estrellas, simplemente me siento muy incomodo y como un entrometido. Así mismo, es muy raro que una chica se decida a ligarse a un chico, esto puede ser muy mal visto en una "señorita decente". La gente puede pensar que es una mujer "fácil" y como el estatus social es muy importante, ninguna chica quiere que se llegue a hablar mal de ella, por lo tanto, ellas tienen que comportarse a la altura y esperar. Sin embargo, una miradita coqueta nunca queda de más, pero tendra que esperar casi obligatoriamente hasta que el hombre se decida a hacer la primera movida. Después de todos esos años en el polo norte, ahora me es casi imposible el hacer esa primera movida.

Aquí en China, la situación es muy parecida a la de México. Esto quiere decir, que no he tenido mucha suerte con las chinitas. Con las europeas puede ser bastante útil la técnica canadiense. Espero, sin embargo, poder volver a usar la técnica latina de nuevo algún día, si es que quiero tener la posibilidad de volver a México y casarme con una mexicana. Por cierto, las mexicanas son las mujeres perfectas para casarse, ya hablare de esto en otra ocasión. Salud!

(English version)
The way to approach girls in a bar is a very important know-how to be aware of, in order to have a successful night out as a guy. I don't know how true is it that girls really go out to a club just to have fun only by dancing between girls, but between guys this doesn't really work. Guys do go out with the hope to get laid, so the quality of the night out depends a lot on how it ends.

Well, hitting on girls could be very different depending on where you are. There is some places where you have to be very aggressive and some others where you have to stand back and wait for things to happen.

I've never been to Argentina or Italy, but I've meet many people from both countries and some others that have been to these countries. It seems that if you want to have any chance to get laid to get laid with an Argentinian or Italian girl, you better have good talking skills and big guts. Argentinian and Italian guys, they are very proactive when hitting on girls, they might get refused a few times or even all night long before they can pick up a girl, it seems a little lame, but that's the way it is. In North America and mostly in Canada, guys normally don't go and hit on girls, but actually, girls go and hit on guys. If you are a guy, you must be thinking, "that is great!" and let me tell you, it is awesome! There is a reason behind this. There is a big feminist kind of thinking in Canada. This means, girls really are independent, girls take decisions and well, girls can do whatever they want. So if a guy come to a girl and try to bullshit on a girl, he won't have lots of chances to making it happen. Also, if a girl likes a guy, she shouldn't be ashame of hitting on a guy just like guys do on girls, this is just the feminist way of thinking. So as a guy, the best thing to do is to chill and wait if you don't want to be judge as desperate to get laid. On the other hand, girls are now used not getting hit on. When I just came to Canada I was used to act more on the Latin way of hitting on girls. Which is some kind of proactive style, but not as strong as the Argentinian or the Italian way. Anyways, I used to go out and try a lot here and there with different girls, even if I failed a few times. But my point is that, there is some Canadian girls that they feel very flattered and special if you go and hit on them, because they are simply not used to this anymore. With time, I became more as a Canadian, more like a passive guy on this hitting on girls thing. Now, when I go back to Mexico is almost impossible for me to go hit on girls and say bullshit to them. I feel like I'm being disturbing. Girls in Mexico will rarely go and hit on a boy. It just doesn't seem good on a girl. "People might think she is an easy girl" and because society status is very important in Mexico, well, they don't want people to talk bad about them. Consequently, girls hold back. However, they might try to give some flirting looks to the guy they like, but they'll wait all the way until the guy makes the first move. After those years up in the north pole it's almost impossible for me to do that first move anymore.

Here in China is a lot like in Mexico. This means that I haven't been very lucky with Chinese girls. With Europeans though, it's not that bad to use the waiting technique. I hope I'll be able to develop that being forward technique again if I ever want to go back to Mexico and marry a Mexican girl, by the way Mexican girls are just great to marry with! I might talk about this another time though. Cheers!

To share or not to share?

That is the question!

It's very normal and natural to be selfish. At the same time, the most "human" thing is to behave yourself and try not to. Well this can change a lot from one country's culture to another. In one hand we can notice that in most of the industrialized countries (USA, Canada, Australia and most of the countries in Europe) the society is highly individualistic. Everyone has it's own things, his own space, his own everything. In the other hand, most of the less developed countries have a tendency to be more group oriented and to share a lot more. In Mexico, people is quite unified and it's very normal to share a lot. In the USA, which it's neighbor just up north, thing are almost extremely different in this aspect compared to Mexico. In the USA, the family is generally not as important as it could be a little bit southern. For example, how many kids get kicked out of their houses exactly when they become 18 in the USA? A lot! In contrast, how many young professionals still live in their parents' house in Mexico? A lot!

I guess is not only a question of rich or poor countries what determines whether there is an individual or group oriented society, even this is a very influent factor. In Japan for example, society is very group oriented, even when they have a very good economic situation. Japanese give a lot of importance to hierarchy and family. So countries with more unified families trend to be more collective, we could say this two go often together

Let me give you another example, when people go to a restaurant in Mexico, let's say it's a small group no more than 10 people, there is a big chance that there is going to be only one person paying, while in Canada, when they bring you the bill, they actually bring one different for each person depending on what each one ordered. The thing is that in Mexico the way it works is that maybe somebody paid the whole bill this one time but the next time is going to be somebody else who does the same thing. In Canada when you go out to a restaurant you do it most of the times with friends, while in Mexico we often go out to eat with the family.

In some African countries this sense of collectivity is even stronger. I had a roommate from Congo once. His computer was broken for a while and he didn't have a TV in his room. It was very normal for him to come to my room when I wasn't there, dressing nothing but boxers. He had always a kind of smell not very pleasant (I don't have anything against Africans, but it is true that on a westerner perspective, they have a very strong body odor) and he would take my laptop, sit on my bed over my sheets, with my pillow over his laps to put MY laptop on it(I hate when people use my laptop! I hate to write my usernames and pw's all over again after somebody else checked his email, signed in to msn messanger, etc. I just hate it, but when people ask: "Can I just check something in your computer very fast?" I can't just say no, it would look so mean, anyways...) and watch TV. Absolutly normal for him! All mine is yours and all yours is mine (I don't know if we can say this in English, but in Spanish we say: "Lo mio es tuyo y lo tuyo es mio"). A lot of you might know the Spanish expression "mi casa es su casa", well he took it pretty seriously. And let's not talk about the food, all I can say, is that he would take whatever he felt like from the fridge. Even that nice cheese that you normally save for a special occasion.

In Mexico, people will always offer to some one who suddenly comes a piece or a little bit of whatever they are eating. Just because it's polite to do it, even when you don't really feel like offering. At the same time, the other person will always answer that he/she doesn't want, what ever fake reason is good to justify, just because that's the way to act if you are a "well raised" person, even if you are really hungry. If they insist a couple more times, then you can accept. It's just the normal and polite way to proceed. Conversely, in Canada nobody offers anything unless they really want to offer you something and people wont retain themselves if they are offered something and they feel like having some. That left me in very bad situations many times.


A funny story; Me and one of my Mexican friends went to a Quebequer's room in the university's residence, where he was with a couple of friends. We went to visit him just to hang out and chill a little bit. They had ordered a pizza just before we got there, so when the pizza got there something really chocking happened. I was OK if they didn't offer us pizza, I mean there wasn't enough for everyone and if they would have offered me I wouldn't have accepted. Well, what happened is that they kicked us out! They said: "We are sorry guy but we just ordered one pizza and it is just enough for us, so is not that we are kicking you out but... you know..." Really, we couldn't believe it! It was way to incredible for us. We left and we never came back! Damn bastards!!! hahaha! What I try to say to myself in this kind of situations is the following: "No no no, I know it's a different culture and I shouldn't judge. It's not a worst way to act, it's just different." And just to clarify, not everyone in Quebec is like this. There is some very nice and welcoming people too.

Anyways, if any of you, between my thousands of readers would like to share a funny story on this subject, please don't hesitate, I'd be very glad to read about it.

Ojos de Chino / Chinese Eyes

Mail que he recibido hoy, es curioso:

Los chinos tienen poderes extraordinarios, o eso dicen...
Quizás el secreto está en que ven las cosas de modo diferente.
Por ejemplo, la imagen adjunta al final de este e-mail es del todo
incomprensible si la miras como occidental...
Pero no como chino ...
Si no lo crees, prueba:
Primero mírala sin más.
Luego tira de los extremos de tus ojos con las manos, pon ojos de chino,
y mira la imagen...sorprendete.

buenísimo!!!

An email I received, i

Chinese people have special powers, at least that's what they say...
Perhaps, the secret is that they see things in a different way.
For exemple, the following image doesn't mean anything to us (occidentals) if we normally see it...
But if you look at it with Chinese eyes is totally different.
If you don't believe it, try it!
Try to look at it normally and then try it again but pulling the skin at the out parts away with your fingers to look like a Chinese and look at the image again.

Amazing uh!


ESPAÑOL


ENGLISH

Introduction

(Spanish Version)
Hola a todos!

Me llamo Jorge Leonardo Guerrero. Nací en México. Viví los primeros tres años de mi vida en España, despues regresé a México para vivir en Hermosillo (Noroeste de México). Pasé dos veranos en campamentos de verano en diferentes partes de Canadá a la de 13 y 15. Despues de la preparatoria decidí irme a vivir a Vancouver. Ahí estuve 6 meses estudiando inglés en la Universidad de British Columbia. Despues de eso, en enero del 2002, me mudé a la ciudad de Quebec donde pase cinco años y medio de mi vida y donde hice mi licenciatura en administración de empresas. Ahora vivo en Shangai China. Vine aqui a buscar oportunidades porque parece ser aqui es "el lugar" del momento. Pensé que seria conveniente aprender Chino y agarrar algo de experiencia laboral aqui en China. Asi es de que aqui estoy, he encontrado un muy buen trabajo en SpanishPod. Trabajo en marketing y servicio al cliente. Es una compañia extraordinaria y con mucho futuro. SpanishPod.com es de los mismos creadores que ChinisePod.com. SpanishPod es un nuevo proyecto que acabamos de empezar y que deberá tener mucho exito basado en un equipo que trabaja muy duro con este mismo fin.

Como puede ver, no soy precisamente una persona promedio. No es que trate de elogiarme, pero estoy conciente de que he tenido muchisima de poder tener la oportunidad de hacer todo esto y estoy orgulloso de mi mismo por haber tomado estas oportunidades y haberlas aprovochado lo mejor de estas.

Ahora dejemonos de formalidides y dejenme decirles que los proximos post que publique ser más interesantes. Hablare mucho sobre diferencias culturales y como esto puede meterte en situaciones ambiguas, chistosas, penosas, difíciles y/o raras. Creanme que el estar en China te presenta aventuras diferentes en todos y cada uno de los dias que pasas aqui.

A veces voy a escribir posts en español y en inglés (mi inglés no será perfecto, pero creo que entendaran bien lo que queiro decir), en otras ocasiones me dará y escribiré solo en español. Así tambien habra veces en las que simplemente habra cosas que no se pueden traducir. Tambien podrán encontrar ocasionalment meterial en francés y si llego a aprender chino pronto, pues tambien habra cosas en Chino.

Bienvenidos!


(English Version)
Hello everyone!

I'm Jorge Leonardo Guerrero. I was born in Mexico. I lived in Spain the first three years of my live, then moved back to Mexico to live in Hermosillo (Northwest Mexico). I spent two summers at summer camps in different parts of Canada at the age of 13 and 15 . After high school I decided to go to live to Vancouver. I stayed there for 6 moths studying English at University of British Columbia. After that, in January 2002, I moved to Quebec City where I spent five and a half years of my life and where I did my bachelor degree in business. Now I live in Shanghai China. I came here to look for opportunities because it seems to be "the place" to be. I thought it would be advantageous to learn Chinese and get some work experience here in China. So here I am, I found a really nice job at SpanishPod. Here I work on marketing and customer service. It's a great company with a lot of future. They are the creators of ChinesePod.com and now we just started with SpanishPod.com which should become a big success based on a great team working hard for that.

As you can see, I´m not be the average kind of guy. I'm not trying to praise my self, but I'm contious that I've been extremely lucky to have the opportunity to do all this and I'm proud of myself for taking them and try to make the best out of them. I´m very Mexican at deep of my heart, but at the same time I feel and I thinks a lot like a Canadian and more precisely Quebecois. The weird thing is that now I´m not a typical Mexican nor Canadian and now that I live here in China, I just feel that I´m a simple citizen of the world.

Now, let's cut the super formal stuff and I'll just tell you that the next posts are going to be a bit more interesting. I will talk a lot about cultural differences and how this can get you in ambiguous, funny, shaming, difficult and/or weird situations. Believe me, being in China means a different adventure on each and everyday you spend here.

Sometimes I'll write this posts in Spanish and English (My english might not be perfect, but I think you can get to understand what I mean), some other times I might be lazy and write only in Spanish. Also there will be sometimes or some material that it just can't be translated. You might find some material in French too and if I get to learn Chinese soon, well there will be some things in Chinese too.

Welcome!